Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Good Morning! We made it!

Camping!  And not only did we "make it" as my title suggests, but we ROCKED it.  Ok, so we're not exactly shopping around for deluxe campers complete with strings of lights, nor are we feverishly booking our next trip to the great outdoors; but overall, camping was a huge success.  So huge in fact, that tears were actually shed by the littlest Wheaton when he was told it was time to pack up to head home. 

Of course, as my hot-mess luck should have it, my camera died as soon as I snapped the first picture on Saturday morning, so all memories of our first family camping trip must now reside in our heads.  EPIC FAIL.  So sadly, pictures didn't happen this weekend. But in no particular order, here are some things that DID happen:

  • Bodysurfing in the lake
  • Building sandcastles
  • Neighbors who played their music too loudly til 2 AM
  • Baby bunnies
  • Live music on the beach
  • Doritos, potatoes, bacon, marshmallows, ice cream cones, lemonade, basically every other unhealthy food you can possibly think of
  • An air pump that wasn't charged up enough to blow up the air mattress
  • A trip to the camp store to purchase a hand-held air pump
  • Playgrounds
  • Walking in the woods with flashlights
  • Basically every other activity that boys enjoy, including but not limited to, both peeing and brushing teeth outside. 
  • Mistaking an adult drink for a kid drink... and then being asked to perform a sobriety test in the form of Follow The Leader.  (Just kidding, that didn't happen.  OMG YES IT DID. We were scared out of our minds that our 5-year-old was gonna be wasted. But thank God he was totally fine.  There was hardly anything left in the cup anyway. Maybe the sobriety test was a little over the top...)
  • The phrases "I wuv tampin'!!!"  and "Woah, camping is so awesome!!"
  • Passing out and completely missing both marshmallows and glow-in-the dark bubbles the second night.
So here we are, home again, and I am fatter than ever.  I'm pretty sure that I gained 50 pounds while away so it's time to get things back on track. 

Here's what's happening on the workout front:

Monday- 4 mile walk (dare I say Power Walk?) with the stroller/ 1-hour Power Body class
Tuesday- (yep, that's today) Arms with free weights/ Zumba = Dunzo!/ Hopefully "hiking"(walking on a trail) with boys later if it's not a million degrees out.
Wednesday-Friday- some running, more weights, maybe another cardio class or 2, hmmm... the possiblites are endless 

What's on your workout agenda for the week???

Have a healthy day,


Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Supplements, Ramadan, and the Summer Olympics

Before I get in to anything that is relevant to that ever-catching title, I'm gonna be a little bragadocious for a second. Today marked the second day in a row that I crawled out of bed before dawn to complete a workout, and the third day in a row of working out.  NBD for a lot of people, but when you don't really have any other place to be, getting up at 5 or 6 isn't that easy.  But I did it.  Wow, I am so fit.

Muscle Test
This is not me, and this is not my doctor.
But this is what happens during muscle testing.
Ok, on to supplements. Do you take them?  I know I've rambled before about my trips to the holistic practitioner, and I went again yesterday.  I got muscle tested again, and once again (third time in row now) my stomach showed up as a problem area.  Last time, I brushed it off and decided not to make it a priority, but she said it seems to be spreading now so we really should.  (And how she can tell it's spreading from touching me with one finger while pushing on my arm, I'm not sure, but I'm going with it).  So I ordered a few crazy expensive totally necessary supplements to help aid my digestion and metabolism.  I'll report back in a couple weeks when I am suddenly being asked daily if I am a fitness model.  Because I'm positive that's how effective these things will be.

And now Ramadan. I was raised Catholic, but I believe that Ramadan started recently, right?  That means that a lot of people will no longer be eating when it's light out.  My sister and I decided that this is a genius way to lose a few L.Bs. Is it appropriate for just anyone to observe Ramadan, or is that actually pretty disrespectful?  (I'm kidding people.  I only thought about observing it for a split second and then decided I really don't have that kind of will power. ) So if you actually DO observe this, then good on you.  I give you a lot of credit.  Even if it is religious based.  OMG... soooooo inappropriate...

Opening Ceremonies for the Olympics are on Friday.  We love the Olympics here in the Wheaton house. My husband doesn't talk about it a lot, but back in the day, with a little focus, he actually could have made it to the Olympic trials.  Yeah, he used to be crazy fast.  As in, ran a mile in 4:12 fast.  Luckily for us though, we will not be home to watch the world come together on Friday night to support and celebrate one another.  Instead, we will be fighting with a tent and a fire as we embark on our first ever camping trip with the boys.

 If you believe in God, now's the time to start praying.   Good Lord, I hope we make it out alive.

This may or may not be my spouse, the last time (also our first time) camping.
Yes, he camped in plaid shorts.  No, he did not know what he was doing. 
Don't judge. This weekend will be FUN.
And that's all I've got for now.  The glorious guy I married (see above) decided to pan sear some tilapia last night even though I wanted it to go on the grill.  He then decided to leave the pan in the sink last night and close the kitchen window.  The smell that is permeating from my kitchen right now is literally making me want to barf. 

Have a healthy day,


Thursday, July 19, 2012

Mid-Week Check In

 I've decided that I'm sick of paying for the childcare at my gym.  It's only $3 every time I bring them, but if I'm bringing them 4 or 5 mornings  a week, I'm suddenly paying about 60 bucks a month for a gym to which I have a free membership!  That's total craziness!  So the good news is that by not paying anymore, I'll be helping us (me) stop wasting money, but the bad news is that now I need to figure out when in the world I'm gonna work out.  OhMyGod... where are you going with this?  Right here, people- I'm back to preaching about early morning workouts! 

I've actually forgotten how much I enjoy them.  It's 7:13 in the morning here, totally quiet in my house (miraculous!) and I am already loving this day. The alarm went off bright and early this morning and I actually got up with it and strapped on the sneaks.  Instead of rolling out of bed once I hear the little monster start to wake everyone else (his brother)  up, I now have 3 miles, some free weights, and some abs completely done.  I am loving it.  So much in fact, that I literally do not care that Husband just stuck his head out of the bathroom door and told me that he's pretty sure the towel he just used to dry himself off with has pee on it, and he realized it once his body was dry and he wiped his face.  Yes- instead of being irritated that someone peed all over the floor, I will embrace this and be happy that the mess was cleaned and the towel was rehung. 

Cat's out of the bag, Cherubs... one of you is a
floor-peer.  You're still cute though.
Gross, but cute.

Ok, they're starting to wake up, so the rest of this needs to be short and sweet:

1. Workouts so far this week:
  • Monday: Power Body
  • Tuesday: a mile on the treadmill and Zumba (another early bird special. Yeah!)
  • Wednesday: nada. I couldn't figure out when to make it happen, so it just didn't. Boo.
  • Thursday: 3 miles outside, upper body free weights, abs
2. It couldn't have been a more perfect morning to run.  And that's saying a lot, because I think by now, everyone is well aware of how much I dislike this activity.  It's finally no longer 100 degrees here. In fact, this morning it was a perfect 65.  I actually had my iPod charged and ready to go for once so I got to listen to more than just my pounding feet and my heavy breathing/panting/gasping. I got sweaty but not too hot, and basically feel like I might want to do it again tomorrow.  Weird, I know.

3. I love summer and don't ever want to go back to work.  I ran in to the mother of one of my students at the gym on Tuesday and this thought was instantly confirmed. 

4. You readers are making it very easy for me to not post.  I'm not quite sure at this point if you like/care what I have to say; or even if you exist at this point.  So I'm begging you to leave me a comment once in a while.  I don't even care what you tell me. Do you have a 3-year-old who drives you insane? Do you read blogs to avoid cleaning your house? Do you drive a black car?  Please.  Give me some sign that you are alive and well. 

Have a healthy day,


Thursday, July 12, 2012


I'm pretty sure I've mentioned once or twice (or five hundred times) in the past that I am a total sugar freak when it comes to the foods I feed my kids.  When they were younger, it was super easy- they didn't even know what they were missing out on.  But know that they're older, they're on to my game.  They totally have it all figured out.  They know that granola bars and candy bars are in fact NOT the same things.  They know that smoothies are in fact NOT milkshakes, and that chips at a cookout are more fun to eat than apples. 

Well, I was SUPER excited to get a giant package of Funky Monkey Fruit Snacks in the mail the other day.  They are little pieces of freeze dried fruit.  They crunch like chips, but have no added sugar or other flavorings.  Just fruit.  I love that, and so did my kids!  They are perfect for any diet you or your kids follow- vegan, gluten-free, organic, nut-free (did I miss any?) 

I know you hoarders care less about the prize, and more about claiming your free goods, so here's the deal:  you gotta go check out my post on skinnymom.com. Follow the instructions over there, and GOOD LUCK! 

Here's the direct link to the post, just cuz I love ya so much and I wanna make this as easy as possible for you. 

Have a healthy day,


Monday, July 9, 2012

Beating the Heat

First of all, before I start telling you all about the exciting Fourth of July we had, (yes, I realize it's over and that no one cares anymore), I need to say something equally as important.  As I've been indulging my addiction to other people's blogs, I've noticed that a lot of people are irritated that it's Monday.  As in, not looking forward to Monday morning workouts, not excited that it's time to get "back to the grind", not anxiously anticipating how great this week is going to be.  WHY????  To that I say, GET OVER IT.  I get it- you're back to work today and you don't want to be.  So what?  You're one day closer to pay day.  It's time to get a fresh start on your goals, start looking forward to all of the things you're going to accomplish this week, and fall back in to your routine.  It's Monday! 

2 cute kids just chillin' on the Fourth.  Except it wasn't chilly. 
It was ridiculously hot.
Also, it was a great day to get spider webs and skulls painted on your body.

So, back to the Fourth.  I woke up early, ready to run.  Remember I made a goal to sign up for a race?  Well, I did it.  (Ok, I'm lying.  I *picked* a race to run on the 4th, but didn't actually register until I got there.)  There were actually about a billion races happening locally that day, and I settled on a 2-miler.  I was thinking about going for an official 5K, but figured that 2 miles would be much more manageable in the heat.  (Not because I've barely been running or anything that silly, OBVI).

I found a friend who was gracious enough to sign up with me.  I'm not even gonna lie- the thought of running with someone made me totally nervous, even though this chick and I have been friends for about 10 years, and nothing about her makes me nervous.  I always run solo, and was scared that I'd be holding her back.  And I'm sure I was.  But she still stuck with me.  She's so nice. 

A 10K was happening at the same time as our 2-miler, and my friend ran in to some people she knew during registration.  When they asked us which race we were doing, they responded with things like, "Well, at least you showed up" and "What are you gonna do, challenge yourself and run it backwards?"  Very funny, Jerks.  Have fun running over 6 miles in the blazing heat.

And yeah, it was crazy hot out.  I actually remember the weather man saying later that night that Wednesday was the hottest day of the summer so far.  Awesome.  What a great day for a non-runner (me) to go for a run.  Even though the race started at 8 in the morning, it was already gross out.  We lined up (and yes, we were right in front this time), and we were feeling great.  Totally ready to reach our goal of banging these miles out in less than 20 minutes.  And then I overheard the superstar runners next to me having a conversation:

Quick Guy 1: you gonna try to beat 14 minutes?
QG 2: I doubt I can go faster than that in this humidity.  Plus with those hills...
QG 1: Yeah, make sure you save some energy for that big one at the end.

WAIT Stop Hold the phone Come again.... HILLS????? Please tell me they were lying.  I've NEVER run up a hill before.  Oh God.  I was gonna die. 
Proof that running happened.  And yes,
I wore a flag bandana as a sweat band then entire time.
I'm pretty sure it made me run faster.
I looked at my friend and she looked at me.  I can't do this, I told her.  "Yes you can, just remember that the faster you run, the quicker you're done," she said.  And that turned in to my mantra. We started running, and she was already going quicker than I had planned on starting.  But I kept up with her and just kept reminding myself to keep my feet moving so that it could be over.  And we got to the first hill.  I tried to dominate it, dug my feet in, and passed people.  I got to the top and was so thankful for the neighbors who were standing at the edge of their lawn with a hose to run through. 

I was SO hot.

But I kept moving my feet, refusing to give in to the fact that my mind was telling me to slow down.  I was about half way done when I realized that the timer on my watch wasn't working!  OMG!  I'm pretty sure these are the only words I panted out the whole time my friend was trying to talk to me, and I'm pretty sure she wanted to punch me when I told her.  But she didn't, and we decided it didn't matter how quickly we were going anyway- all we had to do was finish. 

I slowed down a little, and tried not to think about the fact that there was another hill before it was over.  I think about 17 8-year-olds passed me at this point. 

I was overheating.

But I kept going and then saw the slow and steady way that the road up ahead of me started to climb.  Oh Hell NO. 

About half way up, I wasn't sure if I was going to walk, stop moving all together and just drop out, faint, puke, or die; but I was fairly certain that I wasn't going to finish while still doing something that resembled running.  And then, (thank the LORD), I saw the finish line.

I ran. Faster.  Partly out of desire to have this train-wreck be behind me, but mostly because I didn't want the spectators to think that I couldn't even make it through 2 measly miles while hundreds were about to crush 6.2. 

And when I ran across the finish line, not only did I fail to look at the freaking clock, but when I hit the paddle that a girl was shoving in my face, she said, "nope".  NOPE?????  Are you effing kidding me that I just almost killed myself to finish this blasted race and my time didn't even register??????

But my friend assured me that the clock said 18:45 as she went across, and I was literally right on her heels.  So we said that my time must have been 18:48.  So that's what we're sticking with: 18:48.  Also known as: I SMASHED MY GOAL!!!!!!! (I looked up my "official" time on line later, and it actually did register.  As 18:54, but it also said my friend was 5 seconds later than the clock told her... so we're still sticking with the faster times.  Their official-ness was *obviously* wrong.)

I'm so happy that I did this race, so grateful for my friend who pushed me, and so excited that I didn't actually die so that I could sit around and eat my face off for the rest of the day.

Happy Birthday, America. It was a pleasure celebrating with you.

Waiting for the parade to start and trying not to sweat to death.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Trying Not To Lose My Cool

It's only the beginning of the second week of a very long summer break, and I already feel like these kids are sending me over the edge.  What the freak am I gonna do for the next two months with these heathens?

There are two things that my children do not know how to do: walk and speak quietly.  They have, however, mastered both running and yelling.  They do not stop talking from the time they open their eyes in the morning until their eyes shut (always involuntarily) hours after their intended bedtime.

Loving each other has taken on a new form.  Yes, they still invade each other's space, touch each other incessantly, and must be doing the same exact thing at the same exact time.  However, they are now fighting more than ever.  As in, screaming, tattling, toy-snatching, bickering and "you're not my brother"-ing ALL THE TIME.  The problem is that they won't just fight and leave each other alone for a while.  Ohhh nnoo.. they'll fight like crazy, someone (the 3-year-old) will cry loud enough to wake up the neighbors, I'll flip my lid, and they'll be back playing, touching, laughing, and being too rough all over again.  And so it goes.  All. Day. Long. 

See how nicely we're playing? 
We may or may not start whipping those little Army guys at eachother's faces at any second.
How in the name of God am I supposed to deal with this vicious cycle all flipping summer long?

I will admit, I am often my own worst enemy.  I'll think, "No problem, I've got all day to do anything I want.  I'm on vacation, Baby." Only to get to the end of the day, fall on to the couch after screaming up the stairs for a final time that "Everyone needs to shut their eyes NOOOWWWW!" and wondering, "What in the world did I get done today??" UGHHH!!  What a horrible feeling that is.

So I am trying my hardest this summer to build a routine and stick to a schedule.  I am very quick to forget that while I was all too excited for my schedule to change come June; the boys were not too pysched about how drastically their's changed.  One of them stopped going to school (and therefore stopped seeing his friends all the time). Their babysitter whom they loved stopped coming over. They have no set routine anymore; and no one to hang out with except themselves and their mother. 

I am vowing to break our days up in to kid- time and mama- time.  I will get them around their friends, but I won't overload them with activity.  I will force them to play with the gazillions of toys they have, and I won't step in every time I hear things starting to go awry. I will let them make a mess in the house, but will force them to pick up after themselves.  I will clean while they're watching TV, and will not feeling bad about sitting down when they actually decide that napping is fun. 

And I will pop a Xanax when s hits the fan. 

Have a healthy day,